well i did really well, unfortunately hardly anybody came to church today and one of our rhythm guitarists overslept
Well, I like to think I'm always playing for an audience of One.

If you can't hear yourself and they can't get it mixed in the way you need, get some earbuds and adapter to hook directly into the headphone out on the drum module...then just play with one earbud in. You should be able to hear yourself at whatever level you dial up in that one ear...hopefully you can hear everybody else directly in the other ear.
Our Saturday evening service has an e-kit (and I have one at home.) I really don't like it that much compared to playing my acoustic set on Sunday morning.
--David