My question is how to achieve this independence. Do you just have to take it painstakingly slow e.g. 60-70 bpm
70 BPM? That's a running pace! Some of my best teachers had me starting at 40BPM. We all want to run ahead and do all the fancy stuff, but there is an important element of discipline to developing any new technique. Difficulty is relative to the person playing the excercise.Take it slowly, use a metronome, count subdivisions, and work on making the notes fall as precisely as possible in time, and make your movements relaxed and economical.
Then, do it again.
And again.
There are no shortcuts. To use a (very) old metaphor, you shouldn't build a house on sand. Trust me, if you discipline yourself and work on the coordination basics, you'll find that you'll be able to more quickly pick up the advanced stuff when it comes time to move on. Part of learning is, in fact, learning how to learn.
I appreciate that this is going to probably take me months, but sometimes I feel like giving up because I realise just how unco-ordinated I am. I just need the the perseverence to get through it, but it's just so hard!!
This sentence is so revealing of the conflict going on inside you. You have a desire to do the task. Your brain gets that the task is difficult, but your heart is afraid of unfamiliar territory, afraid that you aren't capable and that you're the most uncoordinated clod in the whole world! (You can't be, I am)

Do you see my point? Your fear is like an untamed horse pulling you away from the direction you want to go.
You recognise the solution is perseverance, though. In other words, you already know the answer to your problem. What you need to do is decide each day when you sit down to practice whether you want to let the horses run you around wherever they want, or whether you want to learn the exercises. Everytime they kick and start (you know, when you think "darn it, this is hard, I'm just gonna jam...) you have to coax them back on track. This is a much bigger job than the exercises, but will pay dividends down the line.