Give me his name ... so I can find his address ... so I can go beat some sense into him! My lord what an arrogant @$$. If ANYONE thinks I'm arrogant ... well ... I'm nothing like this guy! LOL
Here's my opinion on this "teacher" based on what I got from Sidereal's post:
First, I can tell the guy isn't a young lad anymore; he's older and doesn't want to put up with people; period.
Secondly, he's lacking patience. Don't know if I would want to study with someone who lacked patience ... especially when I can see it so early on ... and over the phone no doubt. We all know how many times we misunderstand each other on this forum, via the written word. We can't see each other's body language, and certainly can't hear the tone with which the words are delivered. But, over the phone, with the words that were used, it seems pretty clear where he's coming from. In his defense, he probably gets calls from very young players who try to tell him how to teach, so he starts throwing his weight around. He automatically put Sidereal in this category without really knowing. It's a safety mechanism for this guy and establishes who's boss very quickly. I don't like this type of posturing ... so I typically just say "no thanks" and hang up (I do it all the time with bands, artists, etc.).
Third ... his attitude may work for teaching at the college or university level ... but not private lessons (in my opinion). When I used to teach at schools of higher learning, I would determine what the student needed to work on to fulfill the course requirements. If Sidereal told me he wanted to play Jazz ... I would tell him that we are going make sure that he is proficient in ALL styles and that I've got a course outline for him ... a goal or lesson plan for the next _____ years. BUT ... we aren't talking about college are we? This is a private lesson. If a degree is not going to be awarded for studying drums, I think the process is MUCH different.
A private lesson is synonymous with private consultation. If you HIRE me as your consultant, then I'm going to CONSULT you an what YOU want to be consulted on. When you hire a trainer to help lose weight, tone up, etc., they ASK you what your goals are! I could go on and on with the analogies ... you get the picture. It would be different if Sidereal said "I want to learn Jazz", the teacher hears and sees him play ... which then prompts the teacher to say "we need to work on some technique first" ... and then Sidereal resists, etc. If you go to the doctor, the doctor takes the time to HEAR what it is that brought you there to begin with. If you start telling the doctor "well, I have this pain right here, so I need you to prescribe _____ medication and I'll be on my way," things aren't going to go so well. The doctor should hear what is bothering you, check it out, and make an assessment. He/she may find something that warrants further tests, etc. (Sidereal isn't going in for a general check-up, he's going in with a particular issue to be looked at) This is how a private instructor should be (at least in my mind) and this is how I conduct myself with my students. I listen, make assessments, communicate what I've found, and encourage redirection if it's called for.
So ... I don't know if this kind of attitude is common or not Sidereal. I've run across it before and I don't like it ... and usually don't tolerate it. We all have different temperaments ... so maybe this is just how this guy communicates. BUT ... you are PAYING him to teach you and communicate knowledge! I can get this kind of attitude off the street ... I sure don't need to pay for it. As a good friend of mine once said ... "it's business, so keep it there ... don't get personal with it ... keep it on a professionallevel."
If you feel that you have the strength to put up with him, and you know he has a great musical reputation, then maybe you should still consider studying with him.
At the risk of sounding judgmental, I have to say that this guy sounds like the stereotypical New York / New Jersey, old school posturing for survival purposes. Based on your description, I would bet he's a better player than teacher. Telling you to come out to hear him play doesn't automatically mean he is a good communicator and/or teacher ... or that studying with him will make you a great player. We all know plenty of incredible players who don't know or can't explain what the heck they are doing. Now THAT's frustrating ... to try and study under somone like that.
I had a couple of lessons with a well known instructor (in the area where I live) ... and he also teaches at a major music school. I've played with musicians (here and in another state) who have played with this guy, and they all had good things to say about his playing. I called the guy up and told him what I wanted to work on ... and why I was wanting some lessons. I told him that I wanted him to dissect my playing, and be a hard ass when it comes to my technique. Interesting enough, like Sidereal, I was wanting to focus on Jazz, which was this instructors main bag. So I take my lesson and the guy immediate starts me out on the first three tracks of
Essential Styles ... which are NOT jazz styles. With no regard to my requests, my teaching experience (I teach out of this very book and know it forwards and backwards), or my degrees in music, this guy immediate choose to believe that I didn't know what I needed to work on ... so he started from the beginning. I took a second lesson ... same scenario. He was not giving me what I wanted ... and talked (75% of the lesson time)about things that had nothing to do about me, music, the lesson ... you get the idea? After my third (and last) lesson with this guy ... I clearly saw a pattern. I was kind and considerate of him throughout all the lessons, and never disrespected him. He called me up after a number of weeks and wanted to know if I wanted a lesson. I kindly told him "I will no longer be needing your services; thank you" and hung up the phone. If he had asked WHY or WHAT was going on ... I would tell him ... but getting all personal or confrontational does absolutely no good unless the other party is open and willing to work on it.
Let me say that last sentence again, just a little differently ... I think it's worth clarifying.
Confronting someone will only produce positive results if BOTH parties are willing and wanting to work at resolving the differences. This applies to every relationship you'll ever have on this planet; spouse, employer ... and teacher. If you are unable to communicate with this individual ... you either have to continue trying, taking little steps over a course of time ... or you have to bail. What you choose to do will be based on what you are willing to put into the relationship. If you want to keep your job, then you'll have to deal with your boss. If you want to keep your marriage, then you'll have to love your spouse unconditionally and deal with the differences. If you want to study with this guy ... you are going to have to deal with his attitude and posturing; if not, then just walk away.
