Drumming+Career+Family?

[TamaDrummer]

First off- WOW!!! It has been a LONG time since I visited the Cafe (sorry Bart!), and I have to say DANG does this place look good! The Cafe has been such an AMAZING asset to me in past years, and I'm glad to be back here again!

Anyways, I have a question:
For those of you who manage your career, family and musical pursuits...
How do you do it?

I am 19 years old, have a child due in April, have no idea what I want for a career (was to be Music Educator), and I am a drummer. Perhaps it is the voice of inexperience speaking, but it doesn't seem there is enough time to be a dedicated worker, father, husband and band member in one's life.
So I was just looking to our experienced members on how you fit it all in. How is it possible to be all of those things?

Thanks a lot all! Glad to be around the Cafe again!

[Todd Norris]

Hey TamaDrummer, welcome back!  And congrats on the baby!

I wish I had a good quick solution for you, but in my case, I just had to prioritize everything.  The family (and thus the job) had to come first.  Then music.  I've been fortunate, that I've managed to keep music pretty active after my kids came along.  Sometimes the music gets put aside for a family matter, and sometimes the family can "survive" without me so that I can do something music related.  My wife is very understanding and that helps make it work.  Without her support, I'd never be able to do anything drumming related. 

Fortunately, now that my kids are no longer babies (the are 10), they are able to come along to music events, and they are even starting to participate in some ways.  (One of my musical outlets is with a high caliber bagpipe band and my daughter now dances at our shows, and my son is learning drums.)  So, if at all possible, find ways to incorporate your family into the musical outlets, even if it's just that they like to hang out with your bandmates' families. 

[Louis Russell]

You learn to manage your time.  My daughter was able to finish college, work, be a wife and mother of two children, and the mayor of Fort Cambell, Ky all at the same time.  She was also active in her church.  It amazed me how she managed.  There is an old saying, "if you want something done, give it to a busy man!"  Time management is a wonder asset.

[sleepybrIghteyez]

Definitely manage your time- find a balance and talk to your woman about it. I have 3.5 and 1.5 yr old boys. They are definitely a handful. Family comes first. Then job. Then my music. My wife is pretty supportive, but sometimes she has no problem letting me know when I need to focus less on music and more on the family. I don't mind it at all. Usually I get to do most of my music stuff either late at night, or if I get home early from work. Saturday mornings my wife takes the kids to see her dad who is only home on the weekends (Sometimes we go to the park instead, etc). That's when we usually have band practice. I try to incorporate music with my kids when I can. Right now I'm letting my oldest hang out with me while I surf the boards and listen to some good music. If I gotta listen to 'What Do You Do With A Scurvy Pirate' in the van, I suppose I can expose him to some of my music as well. Muahahahah