Topic: Classic Classifieds  (Read 19564 times)

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Roger Beverage

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Classic Classifieds
« Reply #80 on: April 07, 2006, 03:03 PM »
Wow, is this guy in la la land or what ?

Roger

Dave Heim

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Classic Classifieds
« Reply #81 on: April 07, 2006, 03:08 PM »
Hey man, stop dissing the power and glory that is The Epsilon Rising!

EDIT: Oh, and righteousness. . .  I forgot righteousness.

DRWM

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Re:Classic Classifieds
« Reply #82 on: April 07, 2006, 03:37 PM »
I tried to read the whole ad and I must have gotten bored with it or something............  I just couldn't finish it.  What a bunch of hacks.  

I guess the members of Epsilon Rising really, really believe in their band.

Steve Phelps (Shoeless)

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« Reply #83 on: April 11, 2006, 10:41 AM »
Hey could this be the makings of a (dare I say it) Tribute band in disguise?

All hail the power that is Epsilon Rising!!!!! I speak from the fire and strike heavy with of the sword, in a chorus championing people long oppressed and long suffering (really, I do!)

Seeking Exceptional Visionary Guitarist

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply to: dayton@theepsilonrising.com


Revolution.

We are a power and finesse vocalist/harmonica player/songwriter and a bassist/keyboardist/multi-instrumentalist seeking a guitarist of equal caliber (Jimmy Page) for an original and touring band. We will be touring Europe this summer.

We hold real finances to be used for a solid, independent project/partnership. As a vocalist and harmonica player, I have few equals. (Though I also play some guitar, usaully in open tunings for delta blues derivative music, and some percussion, I'm a vocalist.) The bassist, in his sphere, bass/keyboard/mandolin/etc. is equally as authoritative. We will be auditioning for our drummer seperately and drums will not be reflected in the provided recordings.

I speak from the fire and strike heavy with of the sword, in a chorus championing people long oppressed and long suffering. Music is the gift from God to definitively pronounce our uprising and redemption. This means the poor, the meek, and the oppressed.

The name of this band is: The Epsilon Rising.

We are seeking a guitarist/songwriter!!! who is both a lead and rhthym guitarist where lead means more than just soloing and rhthym means more than just playing chords, who has already spent significant time with open tunings, standard tunings, other instrumentations such as the ukelele, mandolin, banjo, ect. Equally significant is your knowledge sound effects, use of multiple tonalities, studio overdubbing approaches to be explored as creatively as your songwriting -- creating atmospheric sounds and sophisticated arrangements! --- Acoustic and electric, standard and open tunings classic rock/blues/bluegrass/old country/classical/bossa nova/punk/reggae/etc. is a must and only the tip of the iceberg as of the songs that we will be creating. Whether originals, traditionals, covers, rearrangements -- there are no limitations or rules in our methodology. A guitarist who says that he does not play covers, or a guitarist who needs other musicians to find his style or to write songs will not be suitable as the Lead Guitarist of this band. Simply put, we are seeking the guitarist who believes that he has the potential to be the best ever, and it is his life ambition to realize that end. If this is not you, or you do not believe that we are the forum to compliment your talents, or you are in disbelief of this opportunity, remember, there are other bands for you. We wish to hear from people who feel a connection to our music and can actually prove that they can create it and enhance it.

We are interested in continuing to write classic songs that we can call our favorites, to be hyper-jammed out live, with exceptional stage presence. After written and recorded, our songs will still constantly evolve in the live set. We seek the guitarist that takes us to the rock higher and vice-versa, we WILL inspire and expect the same from you. Though we desire someone in a similar age bracket, 21 - 29, for similarities in life focus (music first), come one, come all. Again, we will be touring Europe starting April 2006, so any "issues" (girlfriend, school, family, fear) will not work in this situation. You must feel that pursuing music in this way is your destiny. In fact, if you feel that the words that I'm writing are somehow your own ideas, that's what we're talking about.

The less limits you have, the better. Regarding image, the longer the hair, the better. If you believe in revolution through music, and you have your place to prove in the world of musical giants, then this is the opportunity you have been seeking. Ethnicity is encouraged as we are dealing with the reality of God and all man, not just modern white materialistic, celebrity craving "reality", but truly, the counter culture of human reality.

However, be you black, asian, white, latin, indian, etc, if you have the soul (backed by musical recordings), the spirit of music, then it's game as music is color blind; an auric utopia.

This band hails from the mystics and spiritual, exploring dark and light, as we know that Christ is the Forever King at all cross roads, and the that the people are the poor and downtrodden. We view ourselves as champions of that cause, the representation of liberation in the hearts of the people.

I'm not interested in an e-mail or phone liasons as experience tells us that it produces very little. I'm interested in music. As such, we are providing four recordings on the web site that we would like you to listen to gain a perspective of how we are approaching music. For the recording called "Waves", please record a guitar overdub(s) that would give us insight into what you would naturally add to a song that we are working on. For the recordings "Joy" and "My Baby", please record a separate (not overdubbed) guitar track of two to three minutes for each. This will give us an idea of how you will be able to pick up on some of the many ideas that we will be pursuing and thus, you will be required to learn. Finally, provide us with two or more of your original works that you would like to present to be worked on in this band with one being a guitar instrumental. From this we will be able to get a gauge of your songwriting and creativity. Low quality recordings are fine, so make the recordings happen with whatever means you have. If we feel that the package you send demonstrates our match, then we will fly you to Europe as our guitarist. DO NOT REPLY TO THIS E-MAIL WITHOUT INCLUDING THE MUSIC AND PICTURE REQUESTED ABOVE. We ask for a picture because if you are afraid that your image won't go over well, you are probably right. No offense, a TOURING musician does not have these insecurities and can not in order to be successful at conveying the imagery that we wish to convey. Nevertheless, music will be the determining factor.

Double read this!!!! ---This is for a serious, DISCIPLINED, dedicated musician who is in our mindset and wishes to audition for this band. Come with the expectations of working, critiquing, being critiqued, long songwriting sessions, use of white boards and notes, discussing theory, long recording sessions, playing out often, being in a bus often, and awful lot of practing and rehearsing, frustrations, communicating, success and fun!!! I mentioned practicing because we plan to continuosly push our limits, and being satisfied with the level we are at is complacency, and not a part of this band. If what we are asking to complete this audition seems demanding, we recognize it is. If you are unable to go this distance, then this band is not for you. There are many others to audition for or create on your own. It is not necessary to critique our expectations, but rather we hope that you take a pro-active approach and create great music that meets your own vision!

Again, we self-critique and explore many variations of our music and covers. What we do not do is compromise our music in order to avoid dissagreements or tension and just "move on". This is a way of life, my life, the bassist's life, and in this band, we struggle with the music until we are all satisfied. Please be in the same mindset and have experience working in this manner. If you can not take constructed criticism, or give it, if you can not focus in on the same song for days and weeks as it evolves, then this band situation is not for you. If what we are saying is does not reflect your personality, save your time and words as this band is not for you -- there are many other bands to audition for to suit your expectations or create a band in your own image. This is for a guitarist in our image, and it is not for everyone, but one.

I will mention that this is niether a "straight-edge band" nor "pro-drug" band. We do smoke cannibus but have no expectations for the guitarist of this band other than great music. YOUR RECORDINGS, whether professional studio or from a tape deck, will speak for themselves.

Again, in your e-mail response please send a link or attachment to your audition recordings (Waves, Joy, My Baby, an instrumental, at least one other original that you wish to explore in this band, and a clear, recent photograph). Responses without this, will not be considered!!!!


We have links to the rough drafts of the music you will use to complete your audition at:


http://www.theepsilonrising.com

These are not final products, but will provide plenty enough foundation to successfully complete the audition recordings. We anticipate that it will take you some time to learn and some significant effort.

I must stress that this band has no singular "style", as others have failed to grasp the concept that as musicians we play music. The unifying standard is that the music we produce is consistently classic. The sound sketches here are indicative of different expressions on different days. All of which we wish to develop further in addition to much, much more.
If your audition proves you to be our guitarist, we will provide you with airfare to Europe and advance shelter expense as we live a band together developing are set for the first two to three months.

The guitarist who successfully fulfills the audition and that we select will have the option to receive a weekly living advance in addition to shelter cost. This is, in fact, the opportunity for actualization of the musical dream for the guitarist in our image and mindset.

----

to stand amongst giants:

led zeppelin - pink floyd - nirvana - radiohead - pearl jam (pre no code) - the doors - debussy - the velvet underground - the beatles (post revolver) - rage against the machine - charlie patton - bach - robert johnson - jimi hendrix and the experience - the guess who - alice in chains (dirt and beyond) - james brown (early) - the flaming lips - beethoven - blind melon ( later ) - bob marley - jeff buckley- regina spektor - bjork - hawkwind - tori amos - the greatful dead (early) - credence clearwater revival

may we go forward.



Stewart Manley

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Re:Classic Classifieds
« Reply #84 on: April 11, 2006, 11:03 AM »
Wow. My pretentiometer just exploded.

Dave Heim

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Classic Classifieds
« Reply #85 on: April 11, 2006, 11:09 AM »
That ad is SO BIG. . .

it has smaller ads orbiting it
it has its own gravitational pull
it has its own weather system

Tony

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Classic Classifieds
« Reply #86 on: April 11, 2006, 12:23 PM »
Wow, did anyone follow the link to their website?  The audition song they spoke of, Waves?  Sounds like Derek Smalls is the featured artist!  


Dave Heim

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« Reply #87 on: April 11, 2006, 12:41 PM »
Wow, did anyone follow the link to their website?  The audition song they spoke of, Waves?  Sounds like Derek Smalls is the featured artist!  


Yep - its very Derek Smalls allright!  I gave it a listen, but just like when I read the ad I got bored after a short time and went on to something else.

Tony

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Classic Classifieds
« Reply #88 on: April 12, 2006, 09:51 AM »
Yep - its very Derek Smalls allright!  I gave it a listen, but just like when I read the ad I got bored after a short time and went on to something else.

LOL.  Truth be told, its not fair that I make a braod statement like that, since I only listened to the first minute and a half or so!

Apollo

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Classic Classifieds
« Reply #89 on: April 12, 2006, 12:30 PM »
*Fades In* - robert johnson - jimi hendrix and the experience - the guess who - alice in chains (dirt and beyond) - james brown (early) - the flaming lips - beethoven - blind melon ( later ) - bob marley - jeff buckley- regina spektor - bjork - hawkwind - tori amos - the greatful dead (early) - credence clearwater revival

may we go forward.
*fades out*




My eyes hurt. £1,000 to any one who can recite that from memory  :P

Dave Heim

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Classic Classifieds
« Reply #90 on: April 12, 2006, 12:50 PM »
My eyes hurt. £1,000 to any one who can recite that from memory  :P

I love how specific the influence references are:  james brown (early). . . blind melon (later). . .  greatful dead (early).  

drummer1202

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Classic Classifieds
« Reply #91 on: April 15, 2006, 08:16 AM »

MerlinCoryell

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Re:Classic Classifieds
« Reply #92 on: April 19, 2006, 01:50 PM »
ER contacted little ole me! What a chance! Hate to burst bubbles, but its all a joke.

Along with seeing it on craigslist and houstonbands.net, I recieved an email for session work with the "band".

Though Im not sure of the origin of this message, it has appeared everywhere from CA, to TX, to Asia in forums and ads for a while now. Either its a fake, or its simply a heavily reposted ad for its natural humor.

Hope I didnt crush the dreams of all you who emailed them.

Jon E

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Classic Classifieds
« Reply #93 on: April 19, 2006, 01:52 PM »
I saw the same ad in the Orlando, Florida version of Craigslist.

Dave Heim

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Re:Classic Classifieds
« Reply #94 on: April 19, 2006, 02:12 PM »
Dang!  I was this close ==> <== to applying!  :)

Danno

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Re:Classic Classifieds
« Reply #95 on: April 19, 2006, 07:33 PM »
Yeah, but such an unsophisticated ad is an affront to the majesty of  http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail58.html]Trogdor .



"...an affront to the majesty of Trogdor" -- God in Heaven, that made me laugh.

SteveR

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Re:Classic Classifieds
« Reply #96 on: April 20, 2006, 12:21 PM »
ER contacted little ole me! What a chance! Hate to burst bubbles, but its all a joke.

This ad is apparently making it's way all over.  I had 2 friends email it to me in the last 2 weeks.  As soon as I read it, I wanted to post it here, but alas, there's already a thread dedicated to it.   ;D

I like the part where they say "we are neither straight edge or pro drug, but we do smoke canibus".    Nooooooooo, you don't say!

 

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